I just wanna speak something out, or shout to sun, or scream to moon, or actually, I just need a pill. But what pill do I need, even this I'm not sure. I'm not sure what I'm doing and what I'm willing to do. What is the next step in life? What the hell got in my head? I cannot do anything wrong, or I can do everything right. It seems that I'm doing things right, Oh THANKS GOD, I'm good, I'm good, I'm so so fucking good!!!!Whispering on the lips, or screaming in the mind "keep going and going on, behave as what you should behave,girl..." Life is fucking good, and my life is even better, but I know I'm a lier, such a pathetic lier. I lie to myself, I lie to all the fucking world. I'm not what you guys see, even to myself I don't know who I am and who I should be. I should be happy and I'm happy, but I really wanna cry, I can't help the stupid thinking, I really wanna cry, a cry, a shout and cry...But what can I be crying for? I know what I should be crying for, that 's I'm certain that there's nothing I should be crying for but still stuck with the feeling that I need a deep and fierce crying. Life should be more meaningful, but I have no guts to sufer from the pain of meaningfulness,so I'm creeply live the life day by day, even sometimes I feel good. I shouldn't be so out of control, but you'd better let me go. Don't say I fool you all when you see next minute after this crap text, I will get dressed up and go out for a show. I'm not lying right now, I will go for a show immediately after I listen again to JAI HO. Jai Ho is awesome, but I cannot understand why it's a mixture with somewhat Indian and Spanish. I will love Spanish with my entire life, I'm not lying this time, either.

     Hasta luego, Jai Ho!!! 

 

                       "I never meant to cause you touble

                        I never meant to do you wrong"

    

"But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo

What the hell am I doing here?

I don't belong here..."

 

                                                            "The world is full of refugees
                                                            They're just like you and just like me
                                                             But as people we have a choice
                                                             To end the void with all its force"